Victoria Fellowship Church (VFC)
International and Interdenominational
House Fellowship for week commencing 13th March 2016
Quarter Theme: The Book of Proverbs: Gems of Wisdom
Topic: Wisdom: Wisdom in Choosing Companions
Texts: Prov. 1:8-16, 13:20
Memory Verse: Proverb 13:20 Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm
The dictionary defines companion as one paid to accompany or assist or live with another. Another definition says a friend who is frequently in the company of another. Another definition says a traveler who accompanies you. To help put the first two definitions in proper perspective, we need to know who a friend is? A friend is defined as a person you know well and regard with affection and trust. Another definition says a friend is an associate who provides cooperation or assistance. It is interesting to note that Proverbs 12:26 says ‘’the righteous should choose his friends carefully, For the way of the wicked leads them astray’’.
Another way to craft our memory verse in Proverbs 13:20 is – ‘’Show me your friends, I’ll show you your future. Who you hang out with will determine what you get hung up on’’.
The old adage says it all “A man is known by the company he keeps.” It is very important for our well being to be a great friend to someone and to have a group of good friends supporting you. It can be hard to pinpoint exactly what makes a good friend. Friends will come and go in your life, but more important than how long a friendship lasts, is that a good friend will love you for who you are.
The way you can tell the sign of a good friend is by looking at the actions they take — big and small — that show they care. Matt 7:16, 20…. By their Fruits, You shall know them. At the same time we must be careful who we spend a lot of time with; we all have a propensity to imitate the habits and adopt the interest and opinions of our close friends and we inadvertently embrace the values they profess.
By choosing whom we take on as friends we are charting our own destiny. Some common signs of a good friend include; their unconditional support, non-judgment, trustworthiness, sensitivity about our feelings, no put downs, kindness and respect, someone who love us out of choice not out of compulsion, someone who enjoy our company and vice versa, loyalty, telling us the truth even when it is difficult to do so, someone who laughs with us, they stick around in all circumstances, someone who gladdens our hearts and makes us smile, and most importantly someone who is always present and willing to listen to us.
Moral influence is a two way street and thus we should make sure by our own thoughts, words and deeds to be, a positive influence on our friends as well. The real test of personal excellence is how we conduct ourselves in all matters at all times. It is our actions, which speaks louder than words.
If you want to do all or many of the things listed above for someone you care about, you already know how to be a good friend. Choose your friends who are dependable and honest. Choose friends you are proud to know, people you admire, who show you love and respect — people who reciprocate kindness.
Proceed slowly into new friendships until you know you have common values and perspectives. Be a reliable friend to your new friend. This will take some time and commitment on your part before you can expect it from them.
An important part of having a successful friendship is knowing that you can rely on them to be there to support you, spend time with you and be honest with you. Good friends allow you to experience life appropriately because you can always be your true self around them. You never have to wear a mask, and that is the most joyous way to go through life. Most of all, John 16:13 should be the ultimate guide.
QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION
1) Name one friend that has impacted the course of your life the most and how? Proverbs 13:20; Proverbs 17:17; Proverbs 18:24
2) In assessing prior choices, what practical step or steps do you take from today to amend those relationships be it in school, work, business, marriage, church or your social life? Proverbs 3:5 ; 2 Sam 13:1-33